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Dickens, Charles

"The Pickwick Papers"


'Grummer,' said Mr. Nupkins, reddening with passion, 'how
dare you select such an inefficient and disreputable person for a
special constable, as that man? How dare you do it, Sir?'
'I am very sorry, your Wash-up,' stammered Grummer.
'Very sorry!' said the furious magistrate. 'You shall repent of
this neglect of duty, Mr. Grummer; you shall be made an example
of. Take that fellow's staff away. He's drunk. You're drunk, fellow.'
'I am not drunk, your Worship,' said the man.
'You ARE drunk,' returned the magistrate. 'How dare you say
you are not drunk, Sir, when I say you are? Doesn't he smell of
spirits, Grummer?'
'Horrid, your Wash-up,' replied Grummer, who had a vague
impression that there was a smell of rum somewhere.
'I knew he did,' said Mr. Nupkins. 'I saw he was drunk when
he first came into the room, by his excited eye. Did you observe
his excited eye, Mr. Jinks?'
'Certainly, Sir.'
'I haven't touched a drop of spirits this morning,' said the
man, who was as sober a fellow as need be.
'How dare you tell me a falsehood?' said Mr. Nupkins. 'Isn't
he drunk at this moment, Mr. Jinks?'
'Certainly, Sir,' replied Jinks.


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