He ordered his coach to
wait at a distance, and desired I would give him an hour's audience;
which I readily consented to, on account of his quality and personal
merits, as well as of the many good offices he had done me during my
solicitations at court. I offered to lie down, that he might the more
conveniently reach my ear; but he chose rather to let me hold him in my
hand during our conversation.
He began with compliments on my liberty; said he might pretend to some
merit in it. But however, added, that if it had not been for the present
situation of things at court, perhaps I might not have obtained it so
soon. For, said he, as flourishing a condition as we may appear to be in
to foreigners, we labor under two mighty evils: a violent faction at
home, and the danger of an invasion, by a most potent enemy, from
abroad. As to the first, you are to understand, that, for above seventy
moons past, there have been two struggling parties in this empire, under
the names of _Tramecksan_ and _Slamecksan_, from the high and low heels
of their shoes, by which they distinguish themselves. It is alleged,
indeed, that the high heels are most agreeable to our ancient
constitution; but, however this may be, his majesty hath determined to
make use only of low heels in the administration of the government, and
all offices in the gift of the crown, as you cannot but observe: and
particularly, that his majesty's imperial heels are lower, at least by a
_drurr_, than any of his court (_drurr_ is a measure about the
fourteenth part of an inch).
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