Suddenly she turned and looked at him. Her white teeth showed beneath the
slightly raised upper lip as she endeavoured to force a smile. She said
slowly:
"But surely it cannot all be over, Irgens? Remember, I have sacrificed a
great deal--"
But he shook his head.
"Yes, I am awfully sorry, but--Do you know what I was thinking of just now
when I didn't answer you? You said 'irrevocably over.' I was wondering if
that was proper grammar, if it sounded right. That shows how little this
scene really affects me; you can see for yourself that I am not beside
myself with grief--not even deeply stirred. That ought to show you--" And
as if he wanted to utilise the opportunity to the utmost and leave no room
for doubt, he continued: "Did you say that you have been here three times,
looking for me? I know that you have been here twice. I think I ought to
tell you, so that you can see how impossible it is for me to pretend: I
sat here and heard you knock, but I didn't open. That surely proves the
matter is serious--Dearest Hanka, I cannot help it; really, you mustn't
be unhappy. But you surely will admit that our relationship must have been
a little galling, a little humiliating, to me as well? It is true; it has
not been easy for me to accept money from you continually; I have said to
myself: 'This degrades you!' You understand, don't you--a man with a
nature like mine; unhappily, I am proud, whether it is a virtue or a vice
in me--"
Pause.
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